Call Me Stigmatized

Over the last two years, I've been subjected to two bridal showers, two bachelorette parties, two weddings, and two baby showers. And at each one of them I had a moment where Four-Year-Old-Me is sitting in a chair kicking her feet and watching someone I'm related to open presents, and thinking "Aww, why don't I get PRESENTS!? I want presents!"

What a scam. Find yourself a man, throw yourself a party and you get cool free shit that YOU PICK OUT FOR YOURSELF. C'mon, who's idea was the Gift Registry anyway? "Here are the things I want, if you bring them to this place, at this time, I'll be waiting. Oh, and I might feed you some cold cuts and that weird ambrosia salad Aunt Mable makes. You know, the one with fruit AND cottage cheese. No, really, it's delicious. I'm not sure why it's that color."

And then you get knocked up, and you get to throw yourself another party where you get super cute stuff for a human that no body's even met yet. "I mean, I'm not sayin' your baby is gonna be an asshole, but I got you the kid-cage complete with leash--the sales' person called it a 'pack-n-play'--cause you just never know. Am I right? Huh? Wink, wink."

Well, I had myself a little brainstorm; Cut out the middleman (fiance, baby), and you can get cool free shit you pick out for YOURSELF, that you can actually use YOURSELF. I think I might just throw myself a Spinster Party. What better excuse for a party could there be? "I can barely keep a house plant alive, much less find a husband and hope to bring a child into this world, I NEED those dryer balls because the idea of soft, fluffy towels is the only thing I've got to look forward to."

Google the term and you get a mixed bag. From Wikipedia--"Until the advent of feminism, spinsterhood was generally portrayed as a condition to be pitied or mocked" Huh. You know all the mean stuff people say about couples, what they would say about a single couldn't be much worse. Mock me all you want, as long as I get the booty.

Obviously, I'm not the first to have thought of the idea, as there is no such thing as an "original idea," but I think I might just start a movement. I'm planning on registering at Target and JoAnn Fabrics for things like cat food and yarn. And did you know Barnes & Noble has online wishlists!? Perfect! 'Cause after throwing yourself a "Spinster Shower" you now have an image to maintain.

Shameless Plug

When Pickle gets tired, tired enough that he thinks he's NOT tired anymore, I bundle him up and sing him this song, Lullaby Letgo by Katie Johnston. This song has worked nearly every time he's been fussy about taking a nap.

Katie is one of the most kind and unique souls I've met, and I just have to share her with all of you. Check out her myspace, and give the songs a listen. You won't regret it.

And then, when he gets up and he's a little cranky, we do the "Mahna Mahna" dance. Giggles garaunteed.

Love. This.

"I Got Hurt Feelings, I Got Hurt Feelings"

I've mentioned Flight of the Conchords a time or two here, and I found this fan-piece on YouTube which sums it all up pretty well.

It does me good to remember that things get bad, and then you laugh. Such is life.

Ctrl-Alt-Del in a Big Way

The New York Times has an article on it's website today, about Flint, MI. Click here to read the entire article with photos.

Basically, the Genesee County treasurer is proposing to condense the size of the city, by demolishing abandoned and nearly-abandoned neighborhoods and letting the land sit vacant until things turn around.

I read the headline with shock and disbelief.

I read the article with shock and hope.

Residents who still inhabit some of the houses in these neighborhoods have posted signs announcing no tolerance for prostitution. "A lot of people remember the past, when we were a successful city that others looked to as a model, and they hope. But you can't base government policy on hope," said Flint's city council president, Jim Ananich. "We have to do something drastic, and we have to do it soon."

I think this man, who grew up in the city of Flint and has stayed and is now working in a Civil occupation, is taking a very brave and innovative step. Eliminating blight goes a long way in lifting the spirits of a community. Not to mention the money the city would save on services from trash pick-up, to sewer line maintenance, to the need for less police and fire. But he's talking ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOODS. Not just individual houses.

Now, don't misunderstand, I'm not that idealistic to think that IF this plan gains popularity, it will be a panacea for urban blight and declining cities. And I'm not a homeowner, so to be asked to leave the house you chose to buy, that you worked to make a home, that is something I couldn't even begin to fathom. But this is an opportunity that most cities never get. To start over, to hopefully learn from past mistakes, and to become a model of truly conscious planning. If this is done well, it could become the new model for post-industrial cities. A way cities with crumbling neighborhoods, decaying factories, and near-empty streets can find new purpose and pride.

A sort of Ctr-Alt-Del, if you will.

Having experience in Urban Planning, I can only begin to imagine the scope of this project. And selfishly, I've already started to apply these concepts to Detroit. (Not that the Detroit City Council would ever be that forward-thinking, but that's another story.) And my conclusion; It's just THAT crazy, it might actually work.

Today Must Be Youtube Thursday

One more thing, The Brit sent me this through Facebook. Ah, those Brits.... They sure do have a lot of time on their hands.

I Would Say I'm a Jemainiac

This is the next thing from Jemaine of Flight of the Conchords. I love it. It's a spoof of a Sci Fi writer, and it's just brilliant.

"Let me irrigate your barren earth with fresh cream."



I'm counting the days till I get to see them live and in person!

Oh. My. Jesus.

I was speechless after I watched this. Absolutely gobsmacked. This is what Real Live Magic feels like.

Watch it, and I promise you, you will get an amazing piece of Happy back in your heart.

Tripin'

Ok, so I'm back from the Ego Trip I was on yesterday.

I think my daily vitamin was switched with a Self-Importance pill.

Apologies.

Susan B. Anderson

I picked up a book about a year ago. All about Knit Hats, mostly for babies. It caught my attention for two reasons; Pickle was due to arrive, and I wanted to learn a new knitty trick. I thought hats would be a good place to start.

I was right, hats were a good place to start. This book is great, with easy to understand instructions. Her blog is also a lot of fun. Quirky and informative, and not as self-obsessed as some blogs out there. Not that I would know anything about that....

Maven

Apparently, I'm somewhat of a Maven, according to Malcolm Gladwell and his book "The Tipping Point." What is a "Maven," you ask? Well, "those who are intense gatherers of information and impressions, and so are often the first to pick up on new or nascent trends." Not to toot my own horn or anything....

Except, I'm a Maven that hardly anybody takes seriously. The Dreamboat loaded this music video on my laptop a few months ago. Great concept, really interesting and visual story, and the music was pretty catchy. Yeah, Babe, remember when I played this EXACT SAME SONG on your stereo, oh maybe 7 MONTHS AGO.

Or, how about this band, Kings Of Leon. Ever heard of them? Yeah, friends and co-workers, that's right. I was telling you about them 4 YEARS AGO.

And Knitting? Yeah, it's cool again. I could have told you that 2 YEARS AGO.

So, here and now, I'm going to start posting THINGS YOU NEED TO PAY ATTENTION TO. That's the new tag. Because Red is the New Black is the New Pink? I was so totally there before you were.