As My Life Flashed Before My Eyes....

Last night I was talking on my cell as I got out of my car, which I had parked in my driveway, and I nearly died. OK, fine. That might be a little dramatic, but I could have injured SOMETHING.

I slipped on a patch of ice wearing heels. I told the person I was talking to, "just to let you know, I almost died right then." Their reply, "Huh." Which I took to be 'Huh, wow your delivery was pretty calm, I don't know if I can take that seriously.'

And that could be the end of my little story, but of course, it is not. I slipped on the same effin spot this morning. Only I wasn't talking to anybody at the time, so now I feel the need to tell the story to the whole Internets. I think I pulled my core. (As opposed to two weeks ago when I BROKE my core while shoveling my driveway.) This slip was a bigger slip than last night, I think I might have exclaimed. Something along the lines of, "AIiiIkkgGkkkhhh...unhh"

I just picture my reclusive neighbor watching me out the window (as I imagine she often does, I'm fairly entertaining in my klutzy-ness), and giggling between puffs on her Virgina Slims. And I thought in that moment, please don't let me go out like this.

And the little incident sort of solidified what I've been thinking about lately. That is, I need to move. My lease is up at the end of March, and I just didn't want to think about moving again. Ever. In fact, I remember very clearly, stating as I moved the last box into the house nearly a year ago, "I AM NEVER MOVING AGAIN."

But with all the Spiders, the insanely expensive heating bill I got last month, and now the latest of being nearly brained by the driveway...I think maybe it's time this house and I parted ways. For my own continued existence.....